Sleepy.

I'm feeling kinda better overall.  Department director and manager both sympathized with me on Friday (both guys), as they both thought kidney stones might be a possibility.  One's passed them before, and the other was bloated ("retaining water") from his new meds.  I love my peeps.

I worked a few hours yesterday but then crashed at home afterwards.  This morning I got up for breakfast out, since dropping off hubby's car for routine maintenance means breakfast out during the wait.  I went back to sleep when we got home at around 10:30 am, and got up at 7:40 pm.  Still tired.

Back to dreaming and flying to the land of unicorns and dragons.  I have a beautiful garden with a huge tree and a bench nearby, there.

WTF??? Uber-confused.

So I flipped out Wednesday morning with gross hematuria.... peeing blood in my urine is surprising something I've not had to deal with at all, even with all the microscopic hematuria from years ago.  I made an appointment, figuring I had a bad UTI since I started noticing the usual non-stop pressure and constant urge to pee on Sunday night and had started experiencing flank pain.  The preliminary dipstick test showed that I had some sort of infection so I was prescribed Levaquin for 10 days, since that's a broad spectrum antibiotic and should kill anything untowards in my urinary tract.

Lo and behold, I got the call today about my urine culture, and there's nothing unusual there.  Everything's normal, with the flora and fauna and whatever.  I told her that I was still hurting, and that getting up to pee a lot during the sleep study last night was annoying, plus the flank pain was really really bad.  (It was really hard to get back to sleep a few times since I was hurting tons in my kidney areas.)  I'm supposed to keep taking the antibiotic till it's gone, and of course, call next week if I'm still hurting.  Nice.

WTF is going on??  Am I just super duper stressed from not being able to recover from the health poundings I've been taking this year, or what??  I don't understand!!!  :( 

Oh, and did I mention that the area where my fibroid was removed in March has been hurting a lot again, for the third time since the surgery??  :(

*tries not to cry*

Sleep study experience

I have discovered something worse than morning people - driving across Dallas while surrounded by morning people in rush hour traffic after a crappy night of sleep at the sleep lab. OMFG.

It took a little while for my blood pressure to go down from 177/104 to a more usual 135/83, and lab protocol is that the bottom number has to be below 100 before a patient is wired.  I'm pretty sure I was stressing because I just wanted to rush through and get things over with, but it all turned out okay. 

Measurements were taken of my head so the tech knew where to put certain leads.  I had two upper chest EKG usual whatevers, plus plenty in my scalp, on either side of my jaw and eyes, and one on each leg.  I had a nose thing and straps across my chest and abdomen, oh, and a finger dillie too.  I snapped a pic of myself (not shown here, sorry), sent it to hubby with the caption "Sexy hot" and he replied, "The Matrix has you, Neo."  Yep.

Sleeping with the wires wasn't so bad - I had my own pillow and had turned the TV station from Poltergeist on SyFy to a more relaxing program on the 10 deadliest sharks on Discovery to a more mind-numbing local news broadcast.  I used my Pzizz app on my iPhone, plus listened to a Futurama episode in the middle of the night.  I kinda felt bad for bothering the sleep tech with my having to pee constantly (had to use a call button to have her come in to disconnect me from some wiring stuff in two places), but I think she felt bad for me since I'm dealing with a painful UTI at present.  (Yep, this week has thoroughly sucked, healthwise.  Filling and temporary tooth for a future crown, UTI with flank pain, sleep test fun on a bed that was way more stiff than what I have and in a room way colder than what I'm used to so all my usual and non-usual pain was magnified 50 notches.)  She asked if I wanted to go ahead with the study and I said yeah, since I had to get to sleep anyway so hey, more interesting data to collect, I guess.  Wearing the box where my leads were hooked into (rightmost thing in photo) while in the bathroom was interesting.  Definitely could've been worse.

I won't know the study results until next week, maybe, depending on the download happening this morning and the 1-2 day turnaround time.  I'm resisting the urge to go back to sleep right now, since I need to get ready for work, but maybe just a quick 30 minute nap will help.... yeah.... zzzzzzzz.... oh wait, shower, then maybe zzzzzs.... zzzzz....

Here's hoping the red dot in the middle of my natural part on my scalp was made with waterproof marker, not permanent.

I know, I know...

I've been lax on blogging lately because I've been doing a lot of sleeping.  Some of it was cranky sleep and didn't help at all, but over the last week I've had some really great sleep.  Pzizz Sleep.  $2.99 in the iTunes app store (now $9.99; also $40 at pzizz.com).  It has NLP and binaural beats and never the same soundtrack twice, and it's really made a difference in my attitude and energy levels during my days.

(Of course, my energy level is still pretty tanked, but I've actually been able to think straight for some hours at a time, so yay!!)

I'm also wearing a temporary crown on the backmost tooth on my upper left side.  It's ouchy.  I had a filling yesterday in a tooth next to the one that had the root canal back in March, and was going to have an old filling replaced in the aforementioned tooth but it had decayed so much that I need gold bling.  I don't get to have a porcelain crown as there's not enough room in my small mouth, but that's okay.  I'm reeling from sticker shock from the unexpected expense, so hope I can make it till Friday with $8.40 in checking.  (Yay for hubby giving me some lunch money from his account in the morning, since I usually give him some from mine... and yes, we have had separate bank accounts for the last over 8 years.  We're goobers like that.)

Off to Pzizz and dream of peanut butter cookies, with the goals of trying to not worry about making up hours at work this week and trying to not worry about doing a sleep study Thursday night across town.

Feeling better

Awesome hubby let me cry to myself for about an hour and a half, then gave me a 10 minute back massage.  He also insisted that I have some chips and dip, since he knew I was stressing from an earlier email today, and since one of the best pieces of advice he gives is, "Calm down.  Have some dip."  A few bison tacos with Buffalo Trace bourbon later, I had some Ruffles chip with some ranch dip.  It helped.  Watching Black Adder II episodes also helped.  I'm still feeling blah, but not as terribly blah as before.  Oh, he's also going to work in doing the annual car sticker thing this week, but I'm on my own for my car inspection, which is just fine with me.

I think I'm also gripy because of the rain that came through yesterday, and the way colder weather we're experiencing now.  We may have some SNOW (!!!!!!!!) on Wednesday morning, which would be a treat.  Hopefully it won't stick by that evening, since I have to drive across town on one of the worst highways in the history of ever for cancer group party, but wow.  Snow.  Rain and snow mix, technically speaking right now, but wow.

Also, I got drug dosage info on Cymbalta from my local pharmacy today.  Holy shitballs, Batman.  I'm glad to say it's working a lot more than the Effexor XR was, but I'm thinking I got the nausea and fatigue side effects totally going.  I will happily accept that as a tradeoff for having my libido back though!!

Fucking pissed with life

I've been crying for the last 15 45 minutes non-stop... yep, figured my brain was mush so not working late tonight after all, and as soon as I got in the car, bam with the tears.  I am so pissed and overwhelmed and frustrated and sad and thoroughly incensed and pissed and grouchy and DON'T FUCKING FEEL WELL, and I'm way past tired of it all.

1) The company that I use to host my small business website and some other sites... well, they had another server migration over the weekend (yes, over Thanksgiving weekend, including Black Friday, so buh bye to e-commerce).  This is the second in four months.  This would be okay except for the timing and the fact that none of my shit has been restored.  Oh sure, the DNS looks like it's already propagated, but tell that to my clients who aren't able to do business and who can't get several business proposals via email because they're bouncing back to sender.  Stress.  Full.

2) I'm overloaded with organizing some stuff for work and finalizing other stuff for work.  This would normally not be a big deal, but I've been dealing with an uber-nasty cold all week (on top of everything else, and oh yeah, my stomach still hurts too), so it's been kinda hard to concentrate between all the sneezing alternated with periods of manic stonedness.  (Sudafed.  Love the stuff.  It's fucking up my blood pressure, too.)

2a) Is it fucking too much to ask people to fucking READ what I send them, when they ask nicely for information?

Idiot: "Hi, I have a question about [blah]."
Me: "Did you get the files I sent you?"
Idiot: "Yeah."
Me: "Did you read through the files, specifically the course document information?"
Idiot: "Uh, I skimmed over it."

(Note to all: WRONG ANSWER!!!)

Me: "Well, the course document has a lot of information about the course, but we're still finalizing the content text for the online training portal, so I can't really provide that to you right now."
Idiot: "Well, this is a course outline and doesn't really tell me the contents."
Me: "That's why I included the key points of the training, along with the main information we want to get across, from pages 11-37."
Idiot: "Oh. Now who's this training for again?"
Me: "Going back to page 2..."

*clenching teeth*

Idiot: "Oh. Now how's this going to work online?"
Me: "Going back to the screenshots on page 6..."

*facepalm*

2b) In addition to needing to return 6 voice mails and about 110 emails from people probably just like that, I'm getting everything ready to send to the feds for final approval.  This entails reading through federal language, which my brain is too mushy to comprehend at present.

3) I keep getting pissed at stuff I've been trying to get to, but have been too busy sleeping and taking care of my health to do.  All the writing I keep going in the back of my mind, all the photos I need to work for my small business... oy.  I told hubby that I made a sale today in my online store, and that someone bought a bison mousepad.  He asked if there were any products featuring bison photos I took this summer when we went to Wyoming.  It was all I could do to not break down right then and there, from all the frustration.

4) Why the fuck does anyone get to be this sickly for so long???  I'm having a miserable day because life is a bit of a clusterfuck right now (with stuff I'm not even going into), and I just want to have more than 5 good days in a whole year.  Is that too much to fucking ask!???

5) I have to get my car inspected and the insurance whatever car sticker shit done for both our cars, because tomorrow begins the five-day grace period of "get your shit together or you'll be slapped with huge fines if you're caught not having your shit together," and I'm too fucking tired to do it.  Hubby doesn't want to do it because he's being lazy, and granted he does a great job with keeping the kitchen clean and doing the occasional grocery shopping, but who fucking does the majority of the grocery shopping, cooking, bringing cooked food home on occasion, checking of the mail, and all while feeling incafuckingpacitated?? ME.  I don't have time for that shit.  "That's why I asked you to do that a month ago."  "Well you could've done that a month ago too."  Dammit.  I'm pretty damn sure my job is way more stressful than his is.  I don't need any added stress in the personal life.

6) I also have to get wine and plastic wine cups for a party our cancer group is having in two evenings.  I really need to be working late every day this week, and that's not happening.  Saturday work is going to happen again, and I had hoped to get out and have a little more fun time, like we did last Saturday.  Sucks To Be Me, Totally.

7) I'm also making myself get up early for a freaky important conference call in the morning, doctors appts on Weds and Thurs, and a chiropractor adjustment on Friday.  I'm two months overdue with getting massaged like I need, and don't see where I can make the time for another week or two.  I would just die if I had any kids or old people to take care of.  It's hard enough just taking care of myself, let alone paying attention to my husband whenever I happen to be awake.  :(

I think I'm going to spend the rest of the evening pouting, throwing temper tantrums, having pity parties, and drinking myself to oblivion with various boozes.  That should help me feel better tomorrow, right?  Alcohol plus the Sudafed plus the regular drugs... goddammit I feel like uber-crap right now.

Thanksgiving Weekend with Gastroparesis

We had enchiladas for Thanksgiving lunch.  Bison enchiladas.  That I made.  By popular request.  I think mom-in-law said at least six times, "This is so much better than turkey or ham!" Even hubby's 80-year-young aunt loved the flavor & chewability.  They were awesome.  Mom-in-law provided salad with ranch dressing, and pumpkin pie with whipped cream for dessert.

We ate way more healthily than a traditional T-Day meal (only 429 calories per enchilada as opposed to 2,057 for a traditional plate before seconds).  The ingredients - 1 small onion, a blend of ancho peppers and my brother-in-law's special chili spice, 1-1/2 lbs ground bison, 1 lb shredded cheddar cheese (yes, a whole freakin' pound), 1 19-oz can of mild Old El Paso Enchilada Sauce, and 10 La Banderita large flour tortillas. 429 calories per enchilada, with a not very heart healthy 206 calories from the fat in the cheese, but meh. It's Thanksgiving!!

I especially liked that these were easy to make ahead of time, and the ingredients could be gathered well in advance of the Thanksgiving Grocery Frenzy Days.  Normally I use either a fresh Hatch chile (or two) if they're in season, or a whole can of diced Hatch chiles, and sometimes even more onion. When I go vegetarian, I'll just use black beans or kidney beans, chiles, onions, and cheese. I love corn tortillas but prefer flour for enchiladas, since they roll better and the texture is just way more awesome. Heating the corn ones before rolling helps some, but not enough for me.

When I brown the meat, I add half of the about 1/3 cup of ground spices, and since bison is super lean I'll drain the not-really-greasy-grease into a small bowl. I then add the rest of the spices and half of the diced onion to the browned meat, then add the not-really-greasy-flavored-grease back in. The consistency is pretty much taco meat at that point (like beef after it's been drained, except extra draining is not required with bison, and bison is way healthier than beast anyway). Next comes about 1/2 or 2/3 cup of cheese (whatever I'm feeling that day), along with 3/4 cup of enchilada sauce. Fill the tortillas, wrap, put in glass baking dish already sprayed with Pam. Repeat until done. Smooth the rest of the enchilada sauce over everything, sprinkle onions / chiles / cheese on top, bake at 375F for 18-20 minutes, and devour.

Fyi, this is a modified version of the recipe on the back of the O.E.P. sauce can. I am creative, yet lazy when I can be. :)

Two enchiladas, some salad, and a slice of pumpkin pie was plenty for my stomach to handle.  We've kept things pretty light the rest of the weekend too (when I've been awake, anyway).  For lunch out on Saturday, I had an appetizer as my meal (a jumbo lump crab cake over crawfish in a light butter sauce - yums!!), and for lunch today I had two slices of pizza (I can eat three to four usually, depending on how they're sliced).  All in all, I'm feeling a bit better from napping a lot, taking things easy, and trying the small frequent meal thing, but I'm tired of eating Sudafed non-stop for this dang cold.  Really wishing that'd go away soon.

My Ultimate Honor

I've had a wonderfully productive short work week, and a very sneezy drugged few days going concurrently.  I've been stoned on Sudafed since last night, got 4 amazing hours of sleep, am getting sleepy, and need to make bison enchiladas for Thanksgiving with Jeff's family tomorrow.  (Enchiladas By Me by popular request.  Yay but sigh.)

I got a new all-in-one the other day (on sale, before the holiday rush - WOOT!) but still need to hook it up to my computer.  This computer runs Vista 64 bit, which I think is why the all-in-one that's worked perfectly has crapped out, but it's also kinda old.  Past it's warranty I think, anyway.  This new doohickey features a humongoid 11x17 scanner so now I'll be able to scan Jeff's artwork without fiddling with lighting, adjusting color and sharpening in photo software, and getting grumpy at repetitive attempts to get a good resemblance.  It might get hooked up Friday but I'm thinking it might be more of a Saturday thing.  I want to get the holiday cards done and ready for mailing.  I'm nearly done too.  I just need to seal and stamp the envelopes, and sort into "send this now" time piles, and that's it!

*yawwwwn*

I also have another BFF in my BFF collection.  This one is my husband's "favorite gay" and one of his top favorite people in the history of ever.  It started the other day on FabBFF's Facebook wall, during a discussion on the American Music Awards...

FabBFF status line: Adam Lambert is a screeching queen. With bad hair. Really, really bad hair.

Comment from me: You mean like Perez Hilton?

Comment from FBFF FB friend: LOL!!!!!! You just sent me into a hacking fit from laughing so hard on that one.

Comment from FBFF: LOL!!! Well, we didn't exactly see them BOTH at the same time, now did we...? Hm..

Last night, I chimed in late to a discussion on art (he's an art teacher).  Non-us comments regarding sexual this-and-that before my first comment not shown here.

FabBFF status line: Art; I create it, I study it, I teach it, I feel better through it - what is it FOR??!! Discuss:

Comment from me: Art is for expression of self. So is sex. Go figure. ;)

Comment from FBFF: OOooooo!!! PDM is my new bff!!! Sex is art (depending entirely on whom you're with, what you're doing and how much you've had to drink..then it's just a really, really sloppy lay - which can still be fun (I have a..er, demographic to maintain..)!!!

Me: YAY BFF!!! I'm surprised my sex slave hasn't commented on this thread yet, being a fellow artist. Then again, the daylight change is seriously screwing us up, so perhaps tomorrow.

FBFF: Yeah!!! How is the man-whore? :)

Me: Man-whore misses you fiercely. He says hi. :)

FBFF: And I, him; it's been too long - and it seems you and I have a bff-thing to catch up on.. :)

FBFF: Lovin' the Vermeer pic, btw..a fav of mine for Dutch Baroque, even more so than Rembrandt. Good taste, pretty lady.

Me: Aww, thanks, you hawt stud you! :) Come on down to Dallas anytime now!!

FBFF: Said the pervy lady to the infant...lol

Me: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

See, my current avatar is my face superimposed on "Girl With A Pearl Earring," and I look way happier than the model.  His current avatar is a pouty baby pic of himself.  As hubby later commented, "That is a gay baby."  :)
 
As the night progressed, it became clear that I had become FabBFF's muse.  Me.  A gay man's muse.  THAT is what I consider to be the ultimate honor that can be bestowed upon me.  I can now die happy!!!
 
Part of the thread that commenced on my wall:
 
Status line: PDM is adding her husband's "favorite gay" to her BFF collection, because of art and sex both being awesome forms of self-expression, and we are all up ons about self-expression. :)
 
FBFF: I am, my dear, now YOUR man-whore (as far as dishes, laundry and general errands are concerned): Thou art Aphrodite of Knidos, the Venus of Urbino..Matisse's reclining figures of inspirational beauty (though he was a man-whore in his own mysogynistic way..). yeah, so thanks.
 
Me: SWEET!!!!! Jefferson will be thankful to pass the general kitchen cleaning to you. :) *happy dance*

I am now Liberty leading your fabulous people. The Gala to your Dali. Guernica personified. Any of O'Keeffe's floral expressions. Thou art my inspirational hawt, delicious mess. :-d

(I'm also really looped on drugs, so feeling Guernicish at the moment... would much rather be lounging on a chaise all hedonist like.)

FBFF: Odalesque-like? My brush drips with anticipation...

Me: *squee!*

SushiBFF: Never before have I been convinced that you and Jefferson like some kinky shit that I have no idea about...

FBFF: and THAT, my dear, is why I am am so very much in love with them both..

Tee hee!!
 
Oh yeah - FBFF posted on my husband's wall, and hubby responded just a few hours ago.  I love them both.  :)
 
FBFF: You are, by far, the luckiest sombitch that every existed - I love your wife, and not in a Rodin's "Kiss" kinda way, but more of a Calliope-Clio-Erato-Euterpe-Melpomene- Polyhymnia-Terpsichore-Thalia-Urania-kinda way. And she's hot. :)

oh. pretty fond of you too..

Awesome Artistic Hubster: Thanks for noticing :). I do love her in a Rodin's "Kiss" kind of way. Also "Het Pelsken," because I know exactly what Mr. Rubens was thinking when he painted that.
 
My men are awesome.

"I love you more than pants cheese."

Pizza dinner was fun.  Pics and pants cheese story at http://sojessica.blogspot.com/2009/11/ohhh-maybe-ill-move-to-chicago.html.  :)

Off to the Dallas Arboretum this morning to get my nature on.  Lunch at Fish City Grill to follow.  Without pants cheese.  :)

Just once...

Just ONCE (but in reality, more than once would be awesome)...

Just once in awhile, I'd love to wake up after sleeping for 12-15 hours and feel some semblance of feeling refreshed.  Is that too much to ask, really??  :-(

I figured I've had another marathon sleep session due to lots of things going on at work this week, plus having the body deal with the H1N1 vaccine injection.  Jefferson said, "Remember, a front came through last night too."  Oh yeah.  Gah, it'd be so nice to get back to healthy, but it's mor... uh, afternoons like this that emphasize what a long way I have to go before I get there.  If I ever get there.

I think I'm kinda gloomy today because of still feeling crappy and unrefreshed, plus the weather's gloomy, plus I don't know if my evening drugs got broken down or absorbed properly from the gastroparesis affecting my digestion.  What a gloomy day.

Tonight we're having Chicago-style pizza with friends.  I hear it's pretty authentic pizza, so here's hoping the evening gets less gloomy.

Guess what I found in my phone? (Notice: Pic of Disgusting Stuff Inside Me)

Lucky me got my HiniVax today (FINALLY).  I went during my lunch hour and was in and out of there pretty quickly.  Yay!  So far I don't feel too different, except the injection site had a small delayed pain reaction, but even that's better now.  I've been pretty busy working this week, and although I have the okay to just work 30 hours till the end of November, this week I have 33 or 35 hours on my timesheet.  Oh well, at least I'm kinda getting back to normal and overachieving at the same time.  Wait... is that a good thing or not?  (Getting back to normal equals good. Overachieving while needing to rest equals probably stupid.)

We had a power outage this evening and Jefferson crashed pretty early from all the darkness.  He's got some Seasonal Affective Disorder going on, except he insists that it's not a disorder because it's just his body feeling crappy from lack of light.  I can totally see that, except I've heard him be really grumpy with the "Can't Do Crap From The Time And Weather Changes" so whatever.  ;)  He played some melancholy tunes on one of his Native American flutes while I ate dinner by candlelight.  We then watched some Futurama on my Nokia N810, since it has a handy kickstand and since I wanted to save as much battery on my iPhone as possible.  Ah, the blending of new and old technologies... portable entertainment plus fire equals awesome!

While waiting for the lights to come back on, I started cleaning out the camera roll on my iPhone, and lo and behold, I came across this pic of some of the pics from my endoscopy!  You know how food is supposed to be like, out of your stomach, and pretty much digested, after two or so hours?  Yeah, this is what was left after 14 or 15 hours of eating nothing... yay, gastroparesis. I'm glad they did biopsies on me, with all the food not pushing through, since the sludge might've been hiding any kind of ulcers that may have otherwise shown up in the pics.

(I figured I should share the joy and wonder of the stomach contents after all, since it might put my previous posts into more perspective.  Besides, I've showed this off to a few people, who ended up being disgusted yet intrigued, so am posting this in the name of Fun With Science!  Feel free to click on the pic to embiggen the majesty.  Also, for the record, what should be digesting there is salmon, baby carrots, and broccoli.  I'm just sayin', for those wondering.)

I crashed around 7:30 pm tonight, just as the lights were starting to stay on for more than two minutes at a time.  I set my phone alarm so I could wake later to take my evening meds, and am heading back to sleep soon. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzs are much needed these days.

Well, blargh.

I started off this week hoping that I could go back to my normal work week hours instead of the 30 hours I'd been granted from HR and my boss's boss earlier this month.  Right now I'm like, "Nope, not gonna happen."  I've worked longer than I would've due to a site visit from the DHS/FEMA program manager in charge of my grant and several other grants in my department, and I still need to finish up several more important things but hope to get those done before crapping out early tomorrow.

As soon as I'm as done as I can be, I'm heading across town to get my H1N1 shot, hoping that I won't have a temperature this time.  The vaccine is now available at my local Kroger but they're "appointment only" and completely booked through the weekend.  The nice pharmacy guy gave me a card and suggested that I call on Monday, or even call around to some of their other stores.  He said it was for the high risk group only and kinda looked warily at me when I told him that I'm in it because I've had cancer.  Gosh, what I wouldn't give to be so darn cute some days.  *sigh*

Hopefully I'll be done with all that early enough so I can saunter down to the Dallas Arboretum and spend some much needed relaxation time in nature.  Fingers crossed and knocking on my (hard as wood) head!

Oh yeah - it's freakin' warm here in my locale (70s in freakin' mid-November) and my allergies are going haywire again.  I'm also noticing that adding egg and milk products back into my diet is kinda-sorta helping with the gastroparesis, but not so much.  I had some veggie fried rice at Benihana today and ate some solid chunks of egg, and it's now about 12 hours since I had that, and I just got the usual gastric distress from eating eggs.  Before the H. pylori crap, eggs would wash through me within two and a half hours.  Now, not so much.  Grr.  Arrgh.

At least coffee helped this morning, with clearing out my whole gut.  I swear, when I poop, I usually don't have the whole steaming pile of crap that comes out in one long, uh, expellation, or whatever.  My stool hasn't been normal since beginning the Pylera, but I'm hoping that ends soonish.  At least the color is pretty much back to normal, if not the texture.

Alright, off to sleep since I have an early-for-me conference call.  *sigh*  I'm so not a morning person.

Health crap, social media, and My HiniVax Experience (pt 1?)

The stomach queasiness that came back has been making me a little uneasy over the last few days, but I've been taking the Carafate a little more often and it seems to help.  I'm also taking Skelaxin more, and I guess it's helping because I'm not so stiff when I move, but meh.  I hate taking meds AT ALL, and extra meds on top of meds freakin' frustrates me.  I am drinking alcohol again, and it's definitely helping with the fibro.  All things in moderation, obviously, but oh how I've missed its medicinal properties!!

I saw a GREAT article on ME/CFS/CFIDS/Fibromyalgia/WTF posted on Facebook by one of my friends who has CFS and Fibro.  Behold the majesty at http://bit.ly/17ah4t.

I'm definitely in denial about the possibility that I'm in the same boat. However, after spending most of this last year with tons of crap health crap, I'm warily thinking about it and still pissed that the possibility is there. I'm still working full time because I'm such an overachiever Asian, but full time for me right now means having gone down to 30 hours a week temporarily because of the recent Pylera crap wearing me the fuck out. I'll be back up to speed by end of the month, if not before, dammit.  I also really hope the new research leads to a definitive cause and cure.

Speaking of social media, I saw a tweet from @CDCFlu come through my work Twitter account:

If you have cancer or had cancer in the past, you are at higher risk for complications from flu: http://is.gd/4X8xV

Well, shit.  Nothing like an "in your face" reminder that "yes, you too will be perpetually in the high-risk category for everything forever and ever, awomen."  This prompted me to go searching for locations offering the H1N1 vaccine in my area (again).  My cancer center hadn't gotten any to begin with, and my primary care physician hadn't gotten any either.  I read about some H1N1 vaccine shindigs hosted by my county's public health department but never got through to a real person on the hotline for making appointments.

I posted the link on Facebook and got some great feedback on possibilities from several people.  Thanks to someone I met recently in real life (who I started following on Twitter, who I'm Facebook friends with as of the other week), I learned about a location that had the vaccine available.  Lucky overachieving me hadn't taken lunch as of 3pm due to being busy at work, so I spent my late lunch driving across town to a clinic in a majority Hispanic area.  This is what I'd posted to my Facebook about that:

Status update: [PDM] is enjoying the Mexican polka being blasted outside while waiting for her hini flu shot. And wants tacos. Now.

Comment: Yes, I'm at the [place] at [intersection], next to [other places]. They told me I could come in as a walk in, so I did and filled out their paperwork. I also filled out a form from the TX Dept of State Health Services (for stats purposes).

I have to come back on Friday to get the shot though, since both the nurse and the doctor won't give it to me since I have a 99 temperature, but at least I got the paperwork and $19 payment out of the way. They offered to give me a refund but meh. Now there's a note in their computer system so no worries.

I asked them to make sure to save one for me since I'm in the high risk group from having had breast cancer, and she said they should still have some since they got a big shipment today. I'd go tomorrow if possible; they open at 8am....

Now for fun on 635 going back to Las Colinas so I can work a little more (but not much more).... and then maybe homemade bean dip with chips for dinner. Nom nom nom. :)

For the record, I did have homemade bean dip with chips for dinner, and Awesome Hubby cut up the onions and made the bean dip himself.  :)

Three of my coworkers (who happen to be paramedics) were puzzled as to why a 99F temperature was an impediment to my getting the shot, but oh well.  Perhaps it saved me from getting GBS or getting more sick somehow.  I don't need to know, and that's fine.  Also for the record, I usually run cool, and my normal temp is 97.9, and it's currently 98.2 in both ears. Grr.

I do have to say that I'm not a stranger to doc-in-a-box healthcare, but today's experience was pleasantly much different from what I'm used to.  I'm used to nice, even cushy offices with either lame rock or cool jazz music playing, or something newsy or health-related being shown on whatever flat panel HD screen in the waiting area.  Today there was mariachi music coming in from down the way and at least 6 or 7 screaming, coughing kids running around me.  There were no swanky chairs or comfy sofas, just bright yellow plastic seats that've seen better days.  The paperwork I filled out was completely bilingual, with the last page entirely written in Spanish.  The posters on the walls were predominantly written in Spanish, and the walls themselves were painted in solid intense pastels.  There was no swanky wallpaper with trim, no pens, tissue boxes, or anything advertising whatever latest pharmaceutical that some drug rep had given them samples of.  No receptionist doing work behind a sliding glass panel in the wall, just hard-working, efficient Latinas doing a kick-ass job with handing out prescriptions for waiting patients and getting some other Asians their paperwork for hini vaccinations.

This was solid non-White healthcare, and I loved it.

I do feel that health insurance reform is way overdue, and I'm definitely hoping it helps a lot of people who are at where I was at many years ago (broke, without insurance, barely scraping by or going under even more each month).  I am thankful to have great insurance, a wonderful workplace, a job I enjoy, a great healthcare team, and meds that are affordable, but I'd love to see more offices get down to basics.  It still weirds me out to get some of my cancer checkups at a place that looks like a living room of a wealthy person.

I'm not complaining about the quality of care I receive on a routine basis, but I got quality care today in a run-down area from a person who took my temperature three times before checking with the doctor about denying me the H1N1 shot.  I suppose I could've gotten the nasal spray variety, but I'm supposed to get the inactivated version (and I loathe nasal spray anything) so I'm going back Friday morning, when they suggested I come back.  I don't think I'll get a chance in the next two days to check with the local pharmacies (since local public health department is teaming up with some to get their freshly received HiniVax doses out), so Friday is good.  It'll be good.  I'm totally not a morning person, but I'll make it work.

So sleepy...

I'm so tired... so sleepy... and I worked for 9 hours today, which I haven't done in a long while.  Yay!

*zzzzzzzzzzzz........ zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.......*

Oh wait - my promotion of @FakeAPStylebook was noted by The Copy Bitch in her post today!  Nifty!

*zzzzzzzzzzzz........ zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.......*

Ahhh... what a relaxing day. :)

Hubby's college roommate is in town this weekend and there was much geeking going on this morning. I wasn't a part of today's geekery, though.  I slept in till about 11:30 or so this morning.  I was actually productive for about 45 minutes too, getting new soap dispensers out that I'd bought maybe a week or two ago, and filling them with diluted Dr. Bronner's almond and peppermint soaps for the kitchen and for my shower soap.  (Love that stuff!)  I also did two loads of laundry before fixing myself some couscous for lunch and napping for another three or so hours.

I did meet up with them for dinner, and there was more comic book geekery and iPhone geekery taking place, and that was nice.  I'm currently eating some sliced Fuji apple and thinking I'm going to play some kind of game on the computer before going back to bed.  Tetris sounds good right now.  :)

Definitely liking that I can consciously chillax more than before (without napping so much!).

Sleeping in.

Got worked on by three guys at my chiropractor's office yesterday morning.  That was way overdue and much needed.

Had a pomegranite martini with yummy lamb korma and naan for dinner.  Yum yum yum.

Totally sleeping in this fine Saturday morning.  Yay!

OH YEAH!!

I was so pissed about this that I blanked it out of my mind temporarily:

I HATE DR. MEANIE.

I'm seriously about to fire him.  Maybe.  I want to show him how much of an idiot he is, but I'm figuring this might be a lost cause now.  I could go to another specialist but they're all in the same office.  I'm quickly losing my caring about him hearing I've defected, though.

He was supposed to call in my two standard meds to my pharmacy OVER A MONTH AGO, but it wasn't done.  Apparently the nurse that handles that sort of thing doesn't work for him anymore, and I slipped through the cracks.  I fortunately had an extra refill on one of the drugs so I've been okay, but I finally gently inquired about this today, and finally got my scripts filled after playing phone tag with three people there.

I also talked with a coworker about Dr. Meanie's wanting me to go on a third blood pressure med at times over the years.  He's a paramedic and was all, "Whaaat?  Two I can understand, but three?"  I figured he was getting kickbacks from the first two, but the latest one is a generic (and still available in brand name but at least he didn't give me samples this time).  I mentioned it to said coworker, who replied, "No no, you don't put a calcium channel blocker on top of an ACE inhibitor and a diuretic."

Fucking.  Hate.  Dr.  Meanie.

I'm so not taking it.  Still.  Especially when repeated testing at home shows that I'm a-okay, except for that blasted tachycardia.

Off to eat pizza and beer now.